I’ve always been a very submissive slut. I don’t deny. I’ve been promiscuous, I’ve cheated on my previous husband with other men, I’m a very sinful woman, I deserve to be punished and I want to be punished.


On the other  hand I can’t help but think that I’m actually very desirable. Well, I’m now getting older. I used to be really pretty when I was in my 20s. I had hundreds of men wooing me, pursuing me, some of them were multi-millionaires, some of them were powerful politicians, some of them were professors at Ivy league schools. 


Even though I’m getting old, I still want to think that I am very pretty and that I have great tits and that my pussy is super tight. But ever since I drank my current boyfriend’s piss and he took pictures of me drinking his piss and sent it to all my other FWBs, I became his exclusive slut. My other FWBs wanted nothing to do with me anymore and it made me feel sad. I’ve always had difficulty being monogamous. And here is the thing. Even though we are not officially married, (I don’t believe in marriage anymore), we call each other husband and wife. Sometimes we call each other girlfriend boy friend, some time we call each other owner and slave, some time we call each other sweet heart and darling, and some other times we call each other master and cum dump, I’m the cum dump and he’s the mater =)


It’s all very complicated.


So my owner fucks me raw and when he is not fucking me, he makes me wear dildos, butt plugs and ben wa balls to keep my holes gaping open for him. It’s part of my humiliation ritual. It also makes me incredibly turned on knowing that I’m being humiliated for his entertainment. 


I’m now expected to drink his piss every day and I’m literally becoming his urinal. In the morning when he wakes up, he would drag me to the bathroom and I drink my first cup of his urine. When he comes home from work, I’d be expected to drink more. I’m not allowed to use the sink to brush my teeth. Instead, I brush my teeth in the bathtub and all my oral care products are put on the floor next to the pet cabinet. I’m not allowed to eat at the table either now. I eat on the floor and I feel because I’ve been drinking his piss, he is now treating me less than human, and this makes me sad, but also horny for some reason, knowing that I’m now living as a true inferior. 


He fucks me, he makes me drink his piss, and he makes me gape my holes, but that’s not all. He also beats me, not as forms of punishment, but merely as entertainment for him. When he’s bored, he slaps my face. He slaps my cunt, my ass, and he chokes me and after he does it, he asks me, “How does it feel to finally see yourself for who you really are?” Because when he asks me things like those, I’m always crying and my fingers are rubbing my clit and pussy lip. 
I feel so humiliated, traumatized, and abused, but I can’t leave him because he makes me cum so hard. I have had orgasms just from drinking his piss. Even just the anticipation of drinking his piss makes me want to rub my clit and knead my nipples with my own hands, and he just laughs and smirks when he sees me doing that, knowing that I enjoy being treated as a subhuman sex toy. 


He doesn’t even treat me like a person anymore. I feel I’m being slowly and methodically transformed, from a pristine, well-educated, genteel Chinese lady, into a masochistic, submissive, slut slave. 


He brought a big dog cage that he keeps in the garage and now he makes me sleep inside the cage. When I need to use the bathroom, I’m expected to do it in the backyard instead of using the bathroom in the house. We live in the sub-urb and we have a big backyard that are surrounded by trees. I always go out to the backyard completely naked and I was even asked to dig a hole for myself so I can defecate inside the hole and bury it with dirt. He also has a garden hose next to it so I’m expected to clean myself with the cold water from the garden hose. 


This all sounds like all fun and games until I have to do it everyday and I feel like I’m being exploited, and I feel like I’m being trapped. I can no longer go back to being a normal human being anymore. 


Just last night he made me wear a labia spreader and pissed into my pussy while videotaping it. He said he is going to send the video to all my family members including my son and daughter so they know what a whore their mother is.

The night previous to last night he put a clamp on my pussy and fucked my ass. I feel so ashamed of being such a slut and whore for him and yet I can’t seem to leave him 😦