As I was dozing off to sleep, the images of how I gave birth to my son came back to my memory once again. The same image that has been flashing before me sporadically throughout my son’s growing up.

I saw myself lying on the delivery table, bathed in a pool of my own sweat, my hair hemmed into strings, and my bare legs splayed wide open and stepped into stirrups. My mind was confused and dazed. I remembered seeing myself in the same position during my gangbang sessions and I felt extremely shameful. Sharp pains were shooting through my vagina and my screams were coming at steadily shorter intervals. The doctor was standing between my legs and the nurse was next to me, and I heard the doctor very sternly telling me to PUSH and I obeyed. 

It was such a distinct feeling and it was a feeling that I could never forget for the rest of my life. As I pushed I felt something coming out of me and then I screamed again, after I had thought all my strength to scream was used up. A slow warmth travelled through my entire body as I felt something was taken out of me. It was so amazing what I had felt and I honestly don’t know how to describe it. It was an orgasmic feeling and when my mind cleared up, I realized I just had the most powerful orgasm of my life while giving birth.

The doctor held my son by his legs and dangled his little sex before my face and told me “Congratulations, it’s a boy”, and I thought, he is going to grow to become a big man one day. And then I fainted from exhaustion, exhausted from all the pain I had suffered, and exhausted from all the orgasms he had brought me. 

“Mommy … mommy …”  As I lay next to my son, the remembrance of his soft, sweet, mellow voice came back and lingered, following me down deeper into my sleep where thoughts ceased and all the sights that came in dreams went unremembered. 

I had been completely changed after that day. I had become a mother, and even though I try to concentrate now, even though I feel my heart was being burdened with a thousand words, all my thoughts became scattered like dust in the wind as soon as I hear my son’s voice:

“Mommy … mommy … come see … I made a big mess …”

Confused gusts of memory of my son throughout his life seemed to shift through my mind’s eye now, and he seemed to be calling me from afar, like in a dream. 

He has become a man, a big man. And he is lying next to me on my bed and sleeping beside me. He has become mommy’s big man. 

I smiled to myself at those words in the darkness, his cum still trickling down slowly between my thighs. The phrase had brought up yet another million feelings, and each feeling drove me with bewilderment. Me and my boy, in this darkness, floating through the ages, transcending all the world and defying all the world’s laws, to sleep. “Mommy …. I love you mommy …” Those words were like distant music heard in a deserted night club, mesmerizing me, dulcet to my ear. 

The rest of the world will never understand my love, but to the rest of the world, I say fuck you. My love for my son transcends this world, and my son loves me back.