180 days of slavery day 7


“Bbbbbbbbbzzzzzzzzzz,bbbbbbbbbbbzzzzzzzz,bbbbbbbzzzzzz” was what woke her up the
next morning as her pussy phone rang. Sue opened her eyes to see Judy standing over her. “Time to get up, pet, but I need something firs,.” said Judy as soon as she saw Sue’s eyes open.

“Yes, Ma’am, but please release me. I ache all over,” said Sue.

“Certainly,” said Judy as she released Sue’s ankles. “But before I release your wrists, I am full of cum from the captain and I need you to suck it out for me.”
And she crawled up to where Sue’s mouth was and placed her pussy right on Sue’s

“Suck it out, cunt, then I’ll release you,” ordered Judy.

Sue had no other option, so began to suck out her cunt. She tasted terrible, and the captain’s cum was stale as it leaked out of the pussy on her face. But she did what she had to and sucked until Judy finally got off the bed. Judy untied her and told her to get cleaned up and ready for work. Sue got to the bathroom, pulled the butt plug out and used the toilet. Then she got into the shower and cleaned up.

As she was drying her hair, her attention was drawn to the lock in her ear. Her eyes began to tear up. The embarrassment and days of torment had left her exhausted and humiliated. Dhe touched the lock, tugging lightly on her ear, as she tried to suppress the tears.

When she came out of the bathroom, her clothes were laid out on the bed. It was
her skirt and blouse, but the skirt seemed to have been cut up the back. All the way from the hem to the waistband. Sue put it on and knew her ass would be showing when she walked, but then noticed there were strips of velcro sewn into it. she got them fastened and put her blouse on. she was ready to be driven to work by Judy.

As they walked into the police station, the captain said, “In my office and show

Sue went to his office and stripped. she positioned herself in front of his desk, legs spread apart and hands on the desk, which made her bend at the waist. The captain and Judy entered behind her and watched her get naked for them. Once she was properly positioned, the captain reached up to her cunt and poked his fingers inside. He grabbed the phone and pulled it out saying, “I don’t
think you need this while at work anymore. I’ll use the intercom if I want you.”
Then he laid the phone down on his desk before he continued. “I want you to get dressed, slut, and go sit at your desk. You’ll notice you have a new chair to sit in. Don’t say anything when you see it, just sit down. You’ll know how when you see. Now get moving.”

Sue quickly got her clothes back on and started to reattach the velcro, but Judy stopped her, saying, “No, leave it off. That is for when you walk outside. After all, can’t have all these other policemen getting turned on all the time.” Judy walked with her to her desk and said, “OK, cunt, sit!” She pulled the chair out from under the desk and Sue saw what they had done. In the chair was a dildo and butt plug, positioned just right so when she sat down, they would go up her pussy and ass. They appeared to be permanently attached to this chair. She started to complain, but thought better. And now she knew why her skirt had been split.

Sue moved to the chair and had to stand up on the bottom rung of the legs in order to get her ass high enough to sit in it. She slowly sat down. She felt the instruments enter her holes and tried to stand up on the rung. But Judy pushed her feet off the rung and Sue was impaled by two objects. They forced themselves deeply into her and she couldn’t move.

“Now, just sit like that and do your work. Don’t even think about putting your feet up, either. the captain and I will be watching you!” stated Judy.

Sue started crying from the frustration and the pain in her pussy. It was not only the pain of being hurt, but a pain from needing to get fucked by a big hard white cock. Even if she had her cunt full of dildo, she still needed the real thing. And, if she could get away today, she would find a big white cock to fuck her. The captain and Judy watched her all morning. She squirmed in her seat, feeling those two objects inside her. she just couldn’t get comfortable. And to make it worse, she couldn’t put her feet on the floor or the chair rungs to ease the discomfort. She just had to sit flat on her ass, her naked skin touching the hard wooden seat.

At lunchtime, the captain called her on the intercom. “chink whore, get into my office. And don’t forget to push your chair in all the way unless you want others to see what you have been sitting on.”

Sue carefully got up off her new chair, pushed it way up under her desk and walked into the captain’s office. She forgot to fix her skirt and when she realized it, she knew everyone around had seen her naked ass. She walked into the office and said, “Yes, Sir.” the captain said, “I want you to go get our lunch today. Here is what I want and what Judy wants. You get what you want, too.”

He handed her the list and some money. She started to fix the back of her skirt, but he stopped her saying, “No, leave it just like that. I want your naked ass in view today.”

Quietly she left the office, staying next to the wall on her way out, trying to hide herself. As she was walking out the door, a new rookie cop caught up with her. He said, “Hi, I’m Allen. I know you are the new police informant. Thank you for helping us with catching crimes. I gotta tell you, I love Asian women, and I find Asian culture very fascinating. I’m going to get some lunch, want to join me? Nice earring by the way.”

Sue started to tell him no, but then thought this might be the only chance she had to get fucked today; she simply couldn’t say no to a white man. So she said, “Sure, I was on the way out for lunch, too. Have to get the captain’s. And thank you for noticing my earring. i thought
it was different, so I bought it.”

They left and Sue drove. She said she had to go to two places and hoped he didn’t mind; the captain and Judy had ordered from two different restaurants. But she had already decided to make a detour and go someplace to fuck this good-looking white cop.

As they drove, he was talking to her, but she wasn’t sure about what he said. All Sue could think about was getting his white cock in her hot asian cunt. That dildo made her pussy so wet and it was ready for the real thing. She knew about a little park down the street from the station and pulled into it, knowing that it was deserted most of the time. She found the spot she was
looking for and stopped.

He said, “What we doing here? Can’t buy lunch in a park you know.”

Sue looked at him with a big smile and said, “No, but we can fuck! And I want your hard white cock slamming into my asian pussy right now.”

The cop was shocked, but didn’t argue as they both got out of the car. Sue just bent over the trunk and spread her legs. she said, “Do me stud. Fuck my hot asian cunt.” She had picked the trunk, knowing that the camera wouldn’t see them, should it happen to be on. The cop pulled his cock out and plunged it into her pussy. She moaned and pushed back. Finally after all the torment she went through being denied a fucking, she was now getting it. They fucked like that for about twenty minutes and he finally stiffened and shot his load deep inside her pussy. She came at the same time.


They stayed connected for a short time after that and finally Sue said, “God you are good. I wouldn’t mind a lunch break like that everyday. How about we try to get everyone’s lunch everyday so we can fuck.”

“Great idea!” he said, “You have one hot pussy and I’ll take all I can of it.”

They straightened their clothes and then went to get the food. Sue went into the bathroom to clean her pussy out so the captain wouldn’t notice she had been fucked. She was thinking that now she wouldn’t care if the captain forbid her to fuck. she had her own white cock to fuck now. Getting back to the police station, she went into the captain’s office with the food. Judy was with him and as she shut the door, Judy took the food. the captain said, “Show me!”

Sue was glad to show him now, knowing that everyday she could get away, she was going to have Allen’s hard white cock up her cunt. So, she quickly stripped and positioned herself at his desk as usual. The captain and Judy took all the food out and set theirs on the desk so they could eat. But Judy put Sue’s on the floor. The captain came up behind her, grabbed her arms, bringing them behind her back and handcuffed them.

“Now slut, get on your knees and eat your lunch like a good little puppy,” ordered Judy.

Sue hesitated until she felt the “SMACK” of the captain’s hand on her naked ass. Then she quickly got down in front of her meal and bent over to lick it up. The other two laughed and began to eat their lunch.

They continued eating and watching Sue slurp up her food. They talked and laughed and were making plans for the upcoming night and the long weekend ahead. Sue could hear them and knew she wouldn’t be getting fucked by him anytime soon, since their plans were to fuck each other continually. Finally finishing lunch, the captain allowed her to get up and released her from the handcuffs. He even allowed her to wipe the food from her face. Judy walked with her back to her desk once she was dressed again and made sure she was sitting properly on her new toys. Judy got quite a laugh as Sue eased herself down onto the two objects.

Sue sat at her desk doing her work and never noticed the captain leaving his office. He was making his rounds of the station to check on everything, especially the new rookie cops. He wanted to be sure they were learning and getting their duties done.

As he walked toward the break area, he stopped and listened to two of the rookies talking. What had caught his attention was the fact that he had heard Sue Lee’s name. So, out of sight of the two, he just listened. One of them said, “No way man. The chink whore wouldn’t even let you look at her cunt, let alone fuck her. I heard she was a cold bitch.”

“But it’s true,” said the other, “we went to get lunches and she pulled into this deserted park and begged me to fuck her. And she has one nice asian pussy. You should hear her when she cums.”

“So, you are going to lunch with her every day from now on so you can fuck her again.” asked the first one.

“That’s right,” said Allen, “chink whore lee was the one who asked me.”

“Think I can fuck her, too?” questioned the first guy. “Maybe someday you can take a break and I can go to lunch with her and get some of that hot asian cunt.”

The captain had heard enough and he was pissed. The little cunt was out getting some cock on the side, even after being told that her cunt didn’t belong to her anymore. Sue’s cunt was his and he planned to punish her severely for fucking without permission.

He went back toward his office, but stopped by Judy’s desk on the way. He said, “Come into my office. We have some problems to get straight. Transfer all your calls.”

Judy put her phone on transfer and followed the captain.

The two entered the office and shut the door. Judy was wanting a little afternoon fuck, but the captain wasn’t in the mood. He told Judy what he had heard and that the little cunt had to pay.

They started with the plans to get Sue. They thought about making her walk the streets as a hooker and wouldn’t allow her back home until she made a lot of money. They also discussed having a party at her house with her being the entertainment and fucking all their friends. And they even thought about sending her to the jail for a night with those horny men.

All the ideas sounded great, but they wanted this to be special. Once she was thoroughly fucked, they would fix it so she would never fuck again without permission. It was getting late in the afternoon and they still hadn’t decided on what to do. They agreed to think it over and then talk some more.


The captain was really upset with his little slut, and made up his mind what to do with her. He called Judy to tell her, and she loved the idea. Then he called the jail and spoke with the guard. He found out that the one she had sucked off before would be there in about thirty minutes and this pleased him. He would give him some pussy before he did the rest with Sue and he would keep his mouth shut.

He waited in his office, watching Sue work and from the way she was squirming in her seat, he knew her little cunt would be really wet for later. Then he called back to the jail and the guard he was waiting for was there. He told him part of what he wanted and promised him some pussy if he went along with the plan and wouldn’t tell anyone.

Everything was in place, so he called Sue on the intercom and said he would be out to get her soon. “Be sure all your work is done and we need to put your chair away,” the Captain said.

Sue hurried to finish her work, then got up off her chair and the two objects that had been inside her. she took the chair to the little shift room and put it away and brought another chair out. As she was finishing this the captain came out and said, “Follow me, chink whore.” Sue followed him toward the jail, which took them right past Judy’s desk. She got up and went with them. The three of them walked together without saying anything until they reached the guard station at the entrance to the jail. Then the captain said, “Now, show me!”

“Please, Sir, not here. Others are around. Anyplace but here, please,” she begged.

But he would hear none of it and said, “I said, show me, slut! Now do it!”

Slowly Sue began to disrobe and laid her clothes on the desk. When she had put the last article on the desk, Judy took them all and shoved them into a bag. Sue stood naked before the captain, Judy and the guard, not sure what to do next. “Aren’t you supposed to be in the proper position,” asked the captain.

Sue realized that he expected her to do what she did in his office and leaned over, putting her hands on the desk where the guard usually sat. Then she spread her legs wide and waited.

“Now, slut, who do you think you are anyway? How do you think you can just fuck
anyone without asking me first. And don’t tell me you didn’t, either. I know you fucked that rookie cop this afternoon when you went for lunch, didn’t you?” The Captain was harsh with his words.

“Yyyyyeeesssss, Sir, i did,” she cried, “i was just so hot, i just couldn’t help it.”

“Well, slut, I am going to make sure you get well fucked tonight and that will be the last time you get a cock in that cunt for a long, long time,” stated the Captain.

Sue was shaking now, not knowing what this evil man meant and she cried. She was
so shook up, she couldn’t even talk. Then she heard him say, “Now, just stay right where you are while this nice guard reams your hot cunt for you to get it nice and juicy for the rest of them.”

The guard walked behind her, unzipped his pants and pulled his cock out. She already knew what size it was since she had sucked it before for the captain. But now she was going to feel it in her pussy. And this she didn’t really mind, but it was what was to come next that frightened her.

The guard stepped up behind Sue and without even rubbing her wet slit, drove his
cock deep inside her, all the way to his balls.

“AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHH,” moaned Sue, as she felt him ram it deep in her cunt. He stayed that way for just a short time and then began pumping back and forth, fucking her hard and deep. She didn’t know it, but he had not had any pussy in a long time and hadn’t cum since she sucked him off. She wanted to cum from him fucking her, but to her dismay, he shot his load before she could. She felt him stiffen just as she was getting turned on and then felt his sperm enter her. He quickly pulled out and with the captains insistence he walked in front of her and pushed his softening cock into her mouth.

“Clean it up quickly, cunt,” said Judy, “we have some more surprises for you.” Sue took his cock into her mouth and sucked him until it was clean and then he pulled out, put it back into his pants and zipped up. He knew about what was going to happen next and he would have a front row seat for all the action. He couldn’t wait.

“OK, my little whore,” said the captain, “get your ass up and follow me.”

He walked to the large door that sealed off the jail cells and told the guard to open it. The captain walked in through the doors, followed by Sue and then Judy. The door slammed shut behind them. He walked down the aisle between the cells and stopped when he got to a large table in the middle. He said, “OK, chink whore, get your ass up on the table, and lay on your belly.”

Sue was in shock, knowing that all the prisoners, some of whom she put behind bars, were watching and could see her nakedness. She tried to cover her body, but Judy slapped her hands away.

Reluctantly, she got on the table, knowing that if she didn’t, things would just get worse. As soon as she was laying face down on the table, Judy and the Captain handcuffed her hands and feet to the table legs. Of course, they made sure her whore holes were positioned just right to accept cocks. Sue lay on the cold table, legs spread wide apart, her cunt dripping from being fucked by the guard, along with it being so aroused and listened to the captain.

He said, “Your attention please. Tonight, I have a special treat for all of you. I know some of you have been in here for a long time, while others just arrived. But tonight you are going to be free. Well, at least as free as you can get while still in jail. In a short while, I am going to leave and when I do, all your cell doors will be unlocked.”

Cheers and applause was heard throughout the jail. The prisoners knew something good would happen, especially with this cunt in front of them. The captain held up his hand and called for silence. Then he continued. “As you can see, I have placed this whore in the center of the room. Some of you might recognize her as the chink whore that brought you in here. Well, tonight she is your whore. Once I open your cell doors, you are all free to fuck her in any of her three holes. However, I do expect her cunt to be used the most.”

More cheers, yells, clapping and banging on the bars from the prisoners. Some of these guys hadn’t seen a pussy in so long.

Sue was horrified by what she heard. Her breath was short and shallow. There was nothing she could do but choke back her tears.

Judy was watching from the sidelines and saw that they were already stripping
down to get at this cunt in front of them. She paid close attention to their cocks. It was amazing how different, but so much alike they looked. Some long, some short, some thin, some fat, but all engorged and ready for action. The captain continued talking, “Take your time with her, since you will have all night to use her. I will be back in the morning to get her. I hope you all have
fun, but do remember, no abuse. I don’t want her hurt, I just want her fucked.”

Then as he was walking away, Sue heard him say, “Judy, when we get home, please
call Stephanie and see about an appointment at the house tomorrow night. I want
that cunt fixed!”

Then there was a silence, but only for a short time. Sue lay on her belly on that cold metal table, her cunt openly displayed and left all alone with these horny guys to use all night. How would she ever manage to keep up? she knew it would be bad, but at the same time, it excited her to know she was going to be gang raped. Her cunt was soaking wet with the thought of all those hard cocks
going into her. Then suddenly she heard the electric locks come undone and the doors slide open. Next thing she knew there were men all around her, running their hands all over her and into her. Then came the first of many cocks. One guy stuck his cock into her pussy and rammed it home. He was fucking her hard and fast, going deep with each thrust. she heard him mumbling something about the time he was arrested by this cunt. she didn’t know who it was, nor could she see him, because about the time her had his cock all the way in, a hard cock was stuck into her mouth and
it too was fucking her. No one seemed to care about her feelings, they just fucked her.

The captain and Judy watched for awhile on the screen set up to monitor the prisoners. They could tell she was in for a long night and really doubted that she would want to fuck again for quite some time. her cunt would be really sore by the time morning came. That was a good twelve hours away and as horny as some of these guys were, they knew she would be used all night.

Sue couldn’t move. The only thing she could do is take what she was getting. Hard cocks! Once the first guy fucked her, they lined up front and back and gave her a steady supply of cocks and cum. Some of the men fucked her pussy, some she had to suck off, while others even went for her virgin asshole.

The prisoners were really enjoying their little bit of freedom. Even if they couldn’t get out on the streets, the captain had supplied them with an asian whore for the night and they were making the best of it. Not knowing when they would get an opportunity like this again, they were going to fuck her until they just couldn’t get hard any more.

The captain and Judy watched the monitor as Sue got fucked from every angle. They laughed at the sight of her and knew after this, she wouldn’t be getting fucked, at least in her cunt, for quite some time.

Once she felt no more cocks going into her body, Sue passed out and slept until the captain came to the jail to get her.

Author: jennifer suzuki

I have been a very confused—some might say very conflicted—girl ever since I can remember and I have always lived in a fantasy world of my own making. I was born in Japan, my mother is Chinese and my father is Japanese, and my father's mother or my grandmother was German Dutch, and I came to the United States as a teenager and lived and went to school in Maryland, and worked in New York. I lived in fantasy worlds since I was a teenager and I have always done so, sometimes so deep in my own fantasy I forgot my own identity. I no longer knew who I am. Physically I look more European than asian. My father is of mixed heritage—he has white blond hair, but he also has some distinctly Japanese features. On the other hand my features mostly resembled my grandmother, who was a full blooded European woman. Which was not something that really bothered me. Actually most modern Japanese look very European compared to the rest of asians. My father was a sadist, and my mother, on the other hand, was, in my opinion, a masochist with no self respect. Growing up, seeing my father beating my mother was almost as frequent as having dinner, and when not beating her, she was constantly being humiliated and degraded, like having to serve dinner to him naked on her knees or being tied to an utility pole only in her panties during the winter. At first I believed my mother was a victim, a unfortunate human being in the hands of a cruel evil man, but as I grew older I realized that it was my mother who enjoyed being treated this way. The initial realization made me feel she was a disgusting, perverted, sick person, but as I grew older I began to have the almost identical sexual fantasies that my mother lived and experienced through. I began to think that my mother was the luckiest woman on earth since apparently she had found a man who understood her desires and could give them to her. My dad studied and worked in America before, and during that period he desperately wanted to marry a white woman, and vehemently pursued several white women, but was unsuccessful. At the same time Japanese women were unwilling to marry him. Maybe because just like him they were looking to marry into the white race, or maybe because he had sadistic tendencies. Out of options he settled to look for a Chinese woman. Statistically, marriages between Chinese women and Japanese men have been quite common, and I personally knew quite a few couples just like my mother and father. Even here in America I knew several Chinese women who had Japanese boyfriends and those women were actually quite proud of having superior Japanese men as boyfriends. Japanese in general look much more European compared to other asians and I suspect it was the putative European appearance that attracts other asian women. Of course Japanese are not Europeans, no matter how much we try to become European, just as Jews will never be fully accepted as White Christians. I think Jews and Japanese have a lot in common. We were both persecuted by Europeans, the Jews by Germans, and Japanese by Americans, yet we both come to love our white Masters. Jews weren't officially considered white until very recently, and I think as time progresses eventually Japanese will be categorized as white in the future, though Jews and Japanese will always know that they are still inferior to their Nordic Masters. But as always the Jews will be Masters over the Arabs and the Japanese will be Masters over the rest of Asia. There is no other meaning to life, other than the degree of domination. I had an older sister who looked fully asian, as opposed to me who looked much more European. And ever since childhood I have always known for a fact that I was treated better by everyone else because of my distinctly European appearance. In school classmates would be hesitant to tease me because they always thought my father might be an American or an European man even though they knew my mother was Chinese but somehow they still were afraid of me solely because of my European appearance. The thing was that in Japanese naming system, my mother's last name automatically gets attached to mine, so for example, my name in Japanese would actually be "Suzuki Liu Jennifer", because my mother's maiden name is Liu; this way everyone would instantly know my mother is Chinese. On the other hand my sister was bullied almost everyday by upper classmates because she looked very Chinese. They made fun of her hair and clothes and told her that she looked like a Chinese pig and I had seen boys pulling down her pants and laughing at her for having a "Chinese vagina". I was a very young girl back then and I felt ashamed of having her as a sister so in school I didn't talk to her at all. When I was 12 years old, she committed suicide by hanging herself in her closet. I know this because I was the one who discovered her body. My parents would have never told me about her death if I did not saw her dead body by myself. And ever since her death a dark cloud formed over my head and throughout my teenager years I was constantly harrowed by thoughts of suicide. It was not until I was much older that I learned suicide is infectious and that had been why I was constantly thinking about suicide. The realization made me try not to think too much about death, but no matter how much I try I can never get her image out of my head. Sometimes I feel she still haunts me because I didn't talk to her in school. My parents divorced when I was 14 and I went to live with my mom in China for two years. Contrary to popular beliefs, I had never experienced any form of racism or discrimination against me when I was living in China. Most people assumed that I was an European girl and the aura of being European seemed to make me inapproachable, like the shield of Athena covering me from head to toe. Even when I was in school, when classmates would know my father was Japanese because of my last name, I had never really felt any discrimination, though I did feel they were kind of afraid of me. I had never realized how much being White meant until I was in America: the symbol of power, domination, and superiority that being White implies. Being White is being the entelechy of all that is beautiful, good and righteous. Which is strange because my nationality still is, in actuality, Japanese and as I grew older I started to look more asian. My hair has gotten completely dark and my looks started to resemble my mother's. I used to have very light-colored hair, but I just felt fortunate that I do not look fully asian like my sister was. When I saw this image [of a naked asian woman kneeling next to a black furred dog] in a Japanese SM magazine a few days ago, all of a sudden I remembered seeing my mother in a similar position when I was maybe just 5 or 6 years old. It was not a pleasant experience; it was an extremely scary and traumatic experience, and growing up I heard constant moaning and muffled screams coming from my parents' bedroom. Every evening was a nightmare to fall asleep. But knowing that many asian women were treated the same way as my mother had been treated somehow made me feel better about my own family. At least my parents were not as weird as they seemed, and while growing up I had gradually come to realize that many asian girls have the same masochistic tendencies as I do, but many were just very shy and wouldn't admit their secrets. So it seems there are many masochistic asian women out there who thrives on been humiliated and degraded just like the girl in this image; I don't know why but this image made me feel kind of normal. I have lived in the States for nearly ten years now and I have not talked to my parents, who had divorced, for several years, especially to my mother whom I had some very severe arguments with over the years, especially when she remarried after she went back to China. I was more fond of my father though I haven't really talked to him that much either because he too had remarried. Despite all the mean things I had said about my dad, he was always very gentle with me and never beat me. He beat my sister and my mother but never me and I suspect he was much more gentle with me because of my more European looks. I felt their divorce was a punishment for me, as if they had abandoned me and I never felt comfortable with either of them or their new spouses, whether it be in China or in Japan. My mother's new husband was a very cruel and domineering white man living in China and he never treated me with the same special treatment I received from my dad. And I remember one time when I went out with him people on the street mistook me for his wife and I felt so disgusted I never wanted to go out with him again and then he would yell at me and yell at my mom. I am glad to have gotten out of there. And my dad ... well let's just say I couldn't bear to coexist with his new wife either. The last time we talked was already 3 years ago. This image had brought back so many long forgotten yearnings. I miss my sister and my parents. The memory of my sister and my parents started to fade away, like wavering forms they passed before my clouded sight; their images have become a blur rise about me out of mist and cloud; their faces, and their figures have become shades of phantoms; I wanted to hold you close to me in that blessed fleeting moment when you reappeared to me in my dreams. If only I possessed the strength to draw you near. I wanted to forever remember you—you bear the images of happy days; your airy smiles still stir youthful tremors in my breast—but my memory faltered. It would have been simpler if I were already dead. I would never be seized again by those long forgotten yearnings. I shuddered at those thoughts; and a tear draws other tears. Crying is my only form of release; through crying I am channeled to the solemn and silent world of spirits; crying is my whispered prayer that lingers in a vagrant tone. I have no one to talk to. I live in solitary confinement. I have been driven to madness even though physically I stay put. My life—full of dolor, pain and suffering. Sometimes I wish I could end it. The only reason I continue to live is for otherwise I lack the courage to carry out that final act, to take me beyond and step into the unknown. It is so much better to have been never born at all, or at least to die an immediate death. How sweet and wonderful death would be. My dear Aya, I am so very sorry! A vast space of nothingness in the empty universe fills my heart. Everyday of my life I live in terror because of you. A family dog Growing up, I always felt lonely. My family dog was my only companion. He was a slightly larger than a medium sized dog, with grey and dark fur, and a nozzle that resembled a wolf. He was so cute, so adorable, and he was my only friend. I often played with him in my desperate attempts to communicate with another living being, like Madame Bovary sitting by her fire place in a melancholic longing for escape. I want out!, out of this nonchalant prison of thoughts, out of this cruel alienated society, out of these mind forged manacles whose clanking I hear like looming madness; the marks of domestication on their faces, marks of psychological slavery, marks of intellectual death; they are mere automatons, inanimate objects, so lifeless like straw men, hollow men, stuffed men. I can't bare to look at those miserable beings' faces. In a domesticated dog I see more humanity than the entire humanity. If only my family dog can take me away! And I will elope with him to a happy place, where there is no more sorrow, no more dread, no more cold metallic prison walls of the mind. My family dog was my only friend, and he was my only confidante. To him I entrusted all my deepest secrets. Sometimes I wished I was a dog: no more worries, no more sadness, no more consciousness, no more thoughts, just the need to satisfy my most basic instincts, lying by my owner's feet, worshiping him and completely dependent on him. Sometimes I wish I could have another dog just like the family dog I used to have in Japan. And he will be my husband. I will belong to him. I will be his bitch. I will obey him, crawl under his belly, gently caress his furs with my soft hands, and please him like I would please my husband. And he will be my beast and I will be his beauty. Albeit he will be a gentle beast, always so obedient to me, and yet always so much more aggressive, and animalistic; he will protect me from harm, with his sharp fangs and naturally endowed muscles for chasing down his prey; and yet he will honor me and obey me like a lover would. He will never be jealous, never be angry, as long as he is fed and watered. He will be my best friend.

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